Beer Haiku Daily

At dawn’s early light
The wide world at my fingers
A toast to success

Written by Captain Hops.

References: With Comcast zero for three in three weeks with no light at the end of the tunnel, Verizon claimed they could solve all my problems in 24 hours. They didn’t, but they tried really hard. When problems came up, they owned the problems and didn’t pass the buck. When help was needed, it was called and it was received. You know those Verizon commercials with all the people in the background? I think they were all here. At least six Verizon employees came to my house during the course of the day when they were required and I know of at least three that worked behind the scenes to solve my problems. At no time, was I told to call back later. At no time did anyone give up. The last technician left my house after dark and called back this morning on his day off to verify that the behind the scenes folks had worked on the ticket overnight and I was going to get my service started first thing this morning. By 9:15 AM, that is exactly what happened. I am happy to say that I am now receiving all the glory of the internet, HBO On Demand is appearing on my TV and I have a beautiful dial tone on my phone.

To summarize, it took 24 hours from the start of work and 44 hours from the time of my call to order service to get FiOS working in my house. That’s not bad.

You really get to know a company by how they react to problems. Everyone encounters problems sometimes. In my case, Comcast failed in their reaction and Verizon excelled in theirs.

Thank you.

Thing of the Day: The History Channel Presents The War of 1812

A beer my sole prize.
After heroic effort,
No joy in Mudville.

Written by Captain Hops.

References: Comcast took three weeks and three visits to accomplish nothing. Verizon started out strong using an impressive amount of dedication and ingenuity to delicately muscle through the first couple of problems. Things seemed to be going well. Visible work was getting done. Items were looking complete. When hurdles came up, they threw team members at it. No one gave up. But at the end of the day… still no internet, still no TV, and now no dial tone. They say it should all be straightened out first thing in the morning.

Cold despair after
Cruelly broken promises.
But at least there’s beer.

Written by Captain Hops.

References: After three attempts by Comcast have accomplished exactly nothing, Verizon says they can put in FiOS tomorrow morning. Dare I hope?

If they can pull this off, they will earn the respect, admiration, and praises of this prestigious publication.

If they can pull this off, it will give me the opportunity to tell Comcast to shove it up their asses.

If they can pull this off, frankly, I’ll be shocked.

We shall see, gentle reader, if they can pull this off.

Thing of the Day: You’re Not As Good As You Think You Are: A Demotivational Guide

Waiting with my beer
For Godot, the cable guy
Then he can’t fix it

Written by Captain Hops.

References: You wait for hours. If they arrive, they tell you they can’t fix the problem. Then they go away. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

A show of hands… Has anyone ever had a Comcast guy come within the time frame specified and actually fix the problem on the first try? I don’t think I ever have.

Waiting for Godot in Wikipedia

Perched in my lawn chair
Beer in my hand. Knee wrapped up.
Watching the grass grow

Written by Captain Hops.

References: Boy does the grass grow quickly when you are unable to keep it mowed. For anyone keeping track, my knee is recovering nicely. But I wouldn’t want to risk it by mowing the lawn.

Maybe I need to get one of these:
Thing of the Day: Swisher 52-Inch Zero Turning Radius Riding Lawn Mower With 24 HP Briggs & Stratton Engine

Quantum of Solace
Shared glass of Blue Chimay
Friendship grows on this

Written by Footloose.

Thing of the Day: All About Beer

Just hang out with her
and you’ll know why I call her
“A bar too far”

Written by Captain Hops.

References: You know who you are…
Thing of the Day: A Bridge Too Far (Collector’s Edition) (1977)

Amidst the chaos
Slightly disoriented
I look for refuge

Written by Captain Hops.

Thing of the Day: How to Brew: Everything You Need To Know To Brew Beer Right The First Time

It’s hard not to spill
Navigating with crutches
In the crowded bar

Written by Captain Hops.

References: I’m having knee surgery today. I’m a little anxious.
Thing of the Day: Michael Jackson’s Great Beer Guide

You will never know
If it is the glass too much
If you don’t drink it!

Written by Footloose.

Thing of the Day: One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer

Faced with the deluge
I seek solace in porter
And weather the storm

Written by Captain Hops.

References: Why does it always rain on moving day?
Thing of the Day: Atlantis Encyclopedia

At the crack of dawn
They’ve come to take me away
I cling to my beer

Written by Captain Hops.

References: Moving day. Weee.
Thing of the Day: Marvel Outdoor Series 60HKSSXF 24″ Deluxe Half Keg Beer Dispenser with Caster wheels.